Sunday, February 4, 2018

When Dinosaurs Ruled the Earth (1970)

Director: Val Guest

Writers: Val Guest, J.G. Ballard

Composer: Mario Nascimbene

Starring: Victoria Vetri, Robin Hawdon, Patrick Allen, Drewe Henley, Sean Caffrey, Magda Konopka, Imogen Hassall, Patrick Hot and Jan Rossini as Rock Girl!

More info: IMDb

Tagline: Enter an age of unknown terrors, pagan worship and virgin sacrifice...

Plot: Set in the ancient past when humans and dinosaurs lived together, a small tribe is struggling to survive by giving a sacrifice of a blond woman to their god, the sun, in return for protection from the giant lizards and other creatures that preys on them. Sanna, one of the sacrificial offerings, finds herself on her own when a freak storm interrupts the ceremony. As she searches for a safe haven she encounters hostility from rival tribes and lots of huge and deadly dinosaurs.

My rating: 5/10

Will I watch it again?  Nope.


That's one reason to watch this movie.  The other, and just as important in my opinion, is for the abundance of stop motion dinosaur action.  It's actually good (both the animation and the boobage).  The story is simple.  It's hilarious that all of the blondes get sacrificed...but only when their of age and HOT!  Why would you go through the trouble and expense of raising them?  I guess god only wants them when their ripe for the plucking.  I can't blame him.  The language spoken was made up for the picture.  I would've preferred they spoke English.  This movie is dull and slow but at least the music is good, the women are hot and barely clothed and the dinosaur animation is good.  And then there's that one scene that can make all the difference...





Make that two scenes.  Fun fact:  This move begins by telling us that the moon had not yet formed.  Then suddenly at the end, it shows up out of nowhere causing the ocean to be turbulent and cause chaos on the cave people's beach resort, thus sending our heroes on a boat to an unknown future.  No kidding.





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